Achieving the Impossible

Not long ago, a friend posted about an inspirational blog that had to do with achieving something athletically that you considered impossible. I considered that something I would love to do but would be impossible would be to actually win a race. So that became a goal. I set a long term goal for a very specific race, and I began training. Yesterday I ran a 5k run, my second of the season. About 100 meters out, I looked around. If I run as hard as I can, I have a chance to win. So I ran hard for a lead and decided to just stay there as long as possible. It wasn't easy to keep the pace, but leading kept me highly motivated. Sure enough, I hung in there and did the impossible! Pretty exciting to see how dreams come true! Next up, finishing a 10k trail run.

New Beginning and The Big Cheese

For a long time, something has been eating at me. The something had to do with my various silent sports events such as Nordic skiing, but I wasn't able to put my finger on it until just after this year's Birkie. The Birkie this year, as always, was a blast. It feels amazing to ski that crazy long race (about 30 miles for you who don't know) and to spend a weekend with others who love to ski. Every minute of the Birkie, I ski with joy and gratitude. Yet even with that, most of them (spare one), have left me heading home feeling sad. I was always afraid to admit it, because surely no one would understand how I could do something as fun as the Birkie and not feel completely elated. I couldn't either. But this year, I figured it out. I was bummed afterwards because I knew deep down I was passing up an opportunity. I was not honoring a gift. I was not giving it my all. Deep down, finishing and having fun wasn't enough. I wanted to compete. Not really even to beat everyone else, but to leave that race knowing that I had prepared myself to the fullest and given it my all.

So the day after the Birkie, I decided what I needed to do was to run. My dad was a great runner. In my younger days, I was decent too. Somewhere around my mid-30s I gave up on running and many other adventures, and I came to the realization of late that if I don't try hard, NOW, I may always wonder how well I could have competed. It was this mindset that I started running and signed up for some trail runs. Originallly so I could ski fast, but then, so could run fast again. Frankly, I don't care for crowds or for pavement, and it turns out there is a whole bunch of folks who do trail running. The idea appealed to me greatly. Cross-country team for grown ups. And today was my first race.

I had hoped my return to running would be easy. I would use my vast knowledge to build up slowly, and before long, I'd be gliding along like the old days. This hasn't happened. Even after a couple months, I am slow and often sore. I have an inherited joint condition called anklyosing spondylitis which has flared up and makes anything sore that connects to my rib cage. But I have not lost heart, and today, I had a great experience.

Rolling into the Iola Sports Club to prepare to run, I was suprised to see that I didn't know a soul. For me, this is pretty unusual at any kind of sporting event and particularly at an endurance event. I noted that as I went to get my race packet, I actually felt intimidated and inferior...odd for me, yet an indication of how far away I've fallen in confidence that I would feel out of place with a bunch of recreational runners. Nobody judges anyone at these things, so an interesting indicator that I need to work on not judging myself so harshly.

My goals were to run without feeling awful, finish with a time that didn't embarrass me (like an hour for 5k would have), and to enjoy what I was doing. I knew the event itself would be cool for sure. A very eco-friendly event on beautiful trails with unique food and prizes.

The race itself went quickly, and by the time I had finished, my confidence in my plan to be completitive again was boosted. Thanks to the class I take with Mark Ernst, the hills on the course were nuthin' (and everyone else seemed to struggle). My speed wasn't blazing, but I did not feel I was slogging along. Yay! Further, after about 25 minutes, I actually felt good. Double yay. It was a great experience....the quiet of the woods, the moments where I felt strong, and the delicious gourmet cookies and tart cherry juice at the end.

Much to my delight, I even won a pound of cheese for being 2nd in my age group. It is possible that I was second out of two, but I couldn't have been happier with my the first race of my new start.

Off to a striding start in 2011

It is the middle of winter.  My favorite. The past two Sundays emphasized for me how much I love the beauty of the North and the snow and the cold. Last Sunday, I found myself in Hayward, Wisconsin which is farther north than I am now and from where I grew up.  As I loaded the car to depart, it was 22 below zero.  The landscape was beautiful.  Still, incredibly cold, blues and pinks washing the sky. It was fantastic. It was silent and I wanted to bask in it longer.
This morning, here in Green Bay, it was 7 degrees and still.  The sun was just coming up into a clear sky and I needed to be out in that world.  I took Rosie for a walk into that cold still air and the world was perfect.  We had a fresh snowfall a day ago, and the snow still hung on the trees, sparkling.  It felt so natural, walking through the woods with my dog at 7 a.m. on a very cold winter morning, that I wondered how much of my compulsion to go on that walk was instinct.  I really sensed it is in my cells, that love of the winter morning and the joy in being in nature, cold and so quiet, with the company of a canine.  On this morning's walk, we encountered two chickadees who lit onto some brush above our heads as Rosie ducked into the growth on the side of trail to check things out.  I always feel the company of my Aunt Jean when a chickadee shows up, and it made me smile to think that her spirit might be with us as we carried on the Dawson legacy during our hike. 

While no Scandinavians have showed up on my family tree, I also love to cross country ski.  This season, my training partner and I are skiing a different technique in our training outings. Classic skiing is probably most familiar to folks as it is the kind of skiing everybody learns on.  We have gone back to classic training to complete our races this year, and it has been a fun switch.  Also known as striding, classic skiing is slower than skating but a bit less physically demanding.  Last week, we did our first event, a 42 km "tour" (untimed race) on the Birkie Course and were pretty happy with our 5+ hour result.

Next up, the Badger State Games.

ROY G BIV

Its been a couple weeks now and Rosie is home. She's a great puppy, or little dog, or whatever she is. I believed she was perfect until she broke out of her enclosure and trashed the house. She even climbed onto the dining room table to fetch and shred the library books I had borrowed on "how to train your puppy". Nice. The whole event somewhat spoiled her innocence. Now, she KNOWS that chewing on my stuff is just as much fun as chewing the toys I give her.   This part of the story may qualify as TMI, but Rosie also ate all of the colored pencils except red and orange, and the entire box of special oily bright crayons. I can't recall what they are called. When a puppy eats a full palette of oily crayons, one has to wonder what will come out. I was looking for rainbow poop, but my pal at Duck Creek Coffee Company insisted that when colors mix, you get brown (she should know, she's an artist).  The answer is: you get brown with red streaks, brown with orange flecks, brown with yellow chunks.  The Blue, Indigo, Violet and White colors went unaccounted for. In other words, brown.

In other news, Gabi turned 16 this week, I've been under the weather for 3 weeks and believe I have lost nearly all of my conditioning, and Minnesota has a great snow base.  Next weekend, my training partners and I will venture away to find some white stuff and remember why it is we have covered so many miles on foot and wheels in the last 7 months.  Wahoo! 

Something Wonderful Is About To Happen!

The last year and a half for me, and probably longer actually, has been a time of change. At times, it has been extremely difficult emotionally and I have battled depression on a regular basis.  The optimistic folks in my life excitedly refer to this stage as a Transformation, like it is some great happy thing.  However, it often doesn't feel like that at all, and I am grateful on many days simply to be physically healthy and financially solvent and capable of reaching out for support if I need it, which I usually do.
Anyway, the point in sharing this is that at times I use guided meditations as a way of dealing with my "transformation".  My friend Kara shared with me that Bellaruth Naperstack (nice name, eh?) has these audio meditations which help the subconcious mind to help you put yourself in a place to heal, emotionally and physically.  When life feels the bleakest, I can listen to one of these meditations which I hope then will somehow spur my brain to figure out how to be joyful again.
There is one audio for "Grief".  It lasts about half an hour, and I would agree that it has helped me, more than once.  Like everyone else who resorts to listening to this meditation, I feel very dark and depressed when I do.  So you can imagine how annoying it is, after Bellaruth has coached me through deep, cleansing breaths, when she says "You imagine that something wonderful is about to happen!".   My peaceful breathing is always immediately interrupted as I think (or sometimes shout) "I AM TOO FREAKING DEPRESSED TO IMAGINE THAT SOMETHING WONDERFUL CAN HAPPEN!!!".  

However, it has been at least a month since I have listened to Bellaruth tell me that, and today, I can imagine that something wonderful is going to happen.   This wonderful something is a puppy named Rosie who is waiting for me to pick her up from Wausau on Friday.  Wahooooo!  A PUPPY!   A puppy!!  A PuPpY!!!

I can not imagine one thing more wonderful than a puppy. 

Coffee and Climbing

It is the morning of November 11, 2010 and this is Veteran's day. As a result, I get a Thursday off from teaching school and a beautiful fall day to do with what I please. As I drink my coffee this morning, I am thinking of coffee. My free-lance writing gig offers up article titles to write about based on webcrawler searches.  I read over choices (30,000) and claim titles I want. Today, I have two to write.  One is "Calories in Brewed Coffee", and the other is "Calories in Alterra Coffee".  This is funny to me. First, I could write a one-word article for each that says "Zero."  But that doesn't fit the format guidelines, so I need to dress up my article about the lack of calories in coffee and find a way to make it educational and not too much BS in 300 words.  Alterra coffee is the brand I drink daily at Duck Creek Coffee Company and the coffee I used to sell at CESpresso.  Its roasted right here in Wisconsin. I am eager to get paid to extol just how good Alterra's calorie-free coffee is to everyone who googles that particular query.  As a side, I can't duplicate the articles, so I essentially have to put into 600 words that there are no calories in anybody's coffee.
Climbing will also be a theme today and Saturday.  As we did last Veteran's day, my training pal and I will attempt to rollerski up the tallest hill in Brown County.  It is the Park Road hill in Denmark, one which adjoins property where I once lived. Last year, we couldn't make it without stopping a whole bunch of times. I am hoping to see some progress here.
Saturday, the goal will be to bound up Rib Mountain, the tallest hill in Wisconsin.  I suspect it may be a walk/bound combo, but either way, a great challenge.

Poling Improvement Needed!

I love cross country skiing. I usually refer to it as Nordic skiing, but people aren't always sure what that is. Anyway, I have vowed that living here in Green Bay is the farthest south I shall ever live because I love snow and live to ski.  I spend a lot of time thinking about skiing better, and a lot of time trying to do so. For roughly 12 years, I have focused on the ski technique called skating, which as you might guess uses a skating motion.  Its fast and fun but requires decent technique to excel. I'd like to excel.  I am fortunate to be training with some folks who have helped me identify that I'm not too hot at poling, which is the bad news, but I'd like to think I can improve it and really get a whole lot better.
Today I roller skied and had it videotaped to help me see my faults. I went to buy new ferrules (these are the tips....mine were dull and add to my problems) and Mark sat me down to watch myself hill bounding earlier in the week. We talked about my poor.....poling. 
I'm giving myself a week to do some dramatic improvement. Both in roller skiing and in hill bounding. 
If you see me out and about with poles, you will know why.
Here is the link of today's roller ski clip. 
How I rollerski now. Ug.